This is my story, a story of a woman who has discovered how through my reflections, the truly fabulously lovable me; the authentic me that I was born to be. I have moxie like the trail blazing women of the 20’s.
Today I am a confident, lovable courageous woman who realizes that fairy-tales don’t always have the ending of children’s books, but they can have the ending and continuation of what we truly want and believe. I have sass, courage, spunk, determination and attitude.
This book is the result of hard work and perseverance on a self love journey. It is the reflection of my life and from these reflections I have created a workbook for you, the readers, to assist you on your own journey to find the most authentic loveable you. I am your voice. I speak as you. I have been where you have traveled. I have finished licking my wounds and jumped back into the ring. I am MOXIMIZED!
My reflections shared are not to place blame on anyone in my path, for I take responsibility for my reactions to every challenge I have come across in my life. I just want you to understand that I have walked in your shoes and have never given up. You can restart your life at any time you want and still succeed in whatever you desire. This is not always easy but if it was then the journey wouldn’t be quite as exciting. “Easy is never fun” – to quote my fabulously delicious self love coach.
So I invite you into my world and to reflect upon your world. Enjoy the journey – I promise you it will be the most fabulously wonderful ride of your life.
After I realized that real hair on a head that is not made of Styrofoam was itchy, hot, and cumbersome, I decided to take it off and wear it no longer. It was time to bring my inner beauty to the surface and let it shine through. After all, if I am going to lose my hair, which is so important to us woman, ‐ then have a funky SHORT cut! So I buzzed what was left short, in fact I was pretty well bald. I gasped, no I screeched in the mirror at first look. I considered covering all mirrors with wrapping paper so they would look like birthday presents instead of windows to my superficial self. But who am I kidding, there is more to me than what is or what is not on my head; I’m actually lucky I was a C‐section birth because my head had no ugly malformations to it –wheh!
With time, this whole new look grew on me. The only change I desired first was to color the grey out because leaving it grey accentuated the bald spots, and I could only take so much change; bald might be beautiful but patchy grey, well that was just another story – that only looks good on the female canine species.
I decided that next in order was to get my makeup done to match the short hair‐do. I thought about trying to accentuate my sexy cheekbones or my luscious lips, anything to keep the focus off my head and onto my face. I settled on my eyes and accented their green and gold. My eyes have always been referred to as “sunflower eyes”. They have also had their color described as “breen” – combination of green and brown. I smile and communicate through my eyes; just ask my kids, they know the look.
Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical. ~ Sophia Loren
Letting my inner beauty radiate so large that people didn’t even notice my hair, or lack of it was extremely motivating. It was one of my steps to learning and embracing self‐love. I focused on who I am in the present instead of who I was with hair and who I would be if I had hair again. I celebrated the inner beauty that was bursting forth. It is very liberating to stay in the present and embrace who and what you are.
Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty they merely move it from their faces into their hearts.
– Martin Buxbaum
My self‐love cup runneth over and I finally fill fulfilled. Yeah! The wrapping paper can be ripped of all polished surfaces forever! What power that feeling was and still is as I reflect on that time. When I finally said, “To hell with it, love me for the inner me that radiates from my eyes and my heart, not what’s on my head.” My perseverance and enthusiasm would shout this out to everyone who crosses my path. I am an inspiration for others ‐ I truly loved myself for that!
Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. – Kahlil Gibran
Question: Are you at the stage of starting over? Reflect on the stages in your life that led you to this point. Write the positives you learned from each stage.